How skinny is too skinny?

Oscar G doesn’t wear skinny jeans. Oscar G is a real man.

When Oscar G (a friend of the StyleMeister) posted the following status on Facebook today “ I don’t wear skinny jeans’” he didn’t expect the mad rush of responses. In just an hour, the man had 45 comments of all them giving the man a big nod.

It seems that although we argue endlessly about the ethics of nuclear war, squabble about who killed Michael Jackson and trade blows on Iraq, there’s one thing we all (all?) unanimously agree on – tight, bum squeeze denim is a definite no-no!

See, the bum squeezer only looks great on anorexic female models and some normal chics. The minute real men try and floss in tight jeans they look like human popsicles – their guts and nether parts are suddenly thrown into relief and wait for it … we all begin to question just how comfortable they are with themselves, (and their sexuality) if they’re constantly mincing around in skeletal jeans and tight trousers.

Hell no!

Many other menswear bloggers have also questioned the skinny jeans for men. Some say that there is definitely a place in a man’s wardrobe for the skinny jeans, but, just how skinny should men’s skinny jeans be?

Considering the point raised above, there is an age bracket to who should be wearing skinny jeans. The only exception to anyone over 50 wearing them is Steve Tyler. Period.

The ever popular carrot top skinny jeans. Hmm…obviously needed some air in there!

When you’re trying too hard to fit it all in, it doesn’t work and it shows! And even though skinny jeans have certainly become more acceptable; the feminine connotations are no longer a big problem (we think),  and we no longer have to go to the women’s section to buy the perfect fit and we can leave the house knowing full well that our slimmer choice of trouser will be free from ridicule. BUT – does showing off your birthright package an advantage?

We kinda think that unless you’re Zac Efron, The Jonas Bros, an alien from outer space, Robin Hood or an all American baseball player whose being paid millions to wear them, puhleeeesssse avoid the bum squeezer!

Too skinny? We think so.

HEALTH WARNING:

The skinny jean trend might be causing you real, physical damage.

ABC recently interviewed Dr. Karen Boyle from Greater Baltimore Medical Center, who has recently seen cases of women suffering pain from wearing tight jeans. She explains:

“This disorder is called Meralgia Paresthetica and it’s a disorder that occurs when one of the nerves that runs in the outer part of a thigh gets compressed. The pressure on it causes symptoms of tingling, numbness and pain in the outer part of the thigh.”

According to Boyle, sufferers report a floating sensation—basically, because they can’t feel their lower legs—along with pain in the thighs. Ouch. Unfortunately for women, the problem can be exacerbated by high heels, which cause the pelvis to tilt, increasing the pressure on the nerves in question.

Still, men have to face up to the fact that cosseting jeans reduce airflow around the crotch, resulting in higher temperatures. And the knock on effect of warmer balls is, sadly, a lower sperm count.

To alleviate nerve damage, Boyle suggests buying skinny jeans with a little stretch to them. And whatever you do, if you get pain or numbness in your legs thanks to tight jeans, shift up a size—otherwise, you’re risking doing permanent damage to your nerves. As for curing the overheating, well, I’ll leave that to your imagination. [ABC]

Header Image by Onliska under Creative Commons license

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