Becoming a Real Bad Boy!!

The reason many women today feel that something is missing in their men is because IT IS. In spite of what women they want from the men in their lives, and regardless of what society tells us to want, on some deep primal level women want men who exhibit the traits of an uncorrupted and unadulterated male — that is the abundance of masculine energy (competitiveness, aggressiveness, logic) balanced by lesser traits of feminine energy (easy-going, emotionally intuitive or sensitive).

In the natural and in reality, both of these energies have to be present in an individual for that individual to be “in balance” within him or herself, and to be able to both captivate the hearts and enrage the hormones of the opposite sex. Men have to have some traces of feminine energy just as women have to have some traces of masculine energy for “inner balance” and irresistible magnetism.

A REAL bad boy is the example of a man who has embraced this duality of energies and is most successful at using each energy in the right way, at the right time, in the right place and unto the right person.

(and yeah we know Bad Boys II came out in ’03, but that film is still 100% relevant dudes to being a bad boy a la Big Willy Style!)

A real bad boy isn’t necessarily a model of physical perfection — just a real human being with scars, warts, defects and all but someone who is very confident in who he is and in his own person.

A real bad boy – quick-witted in a boyish cheeky way and whatever his age, he never seems to grow old at heart, dull in mind or weary in body.

A real bad boy – he always adds an unpredictable and mysterious edge of danger in everything he does (that lone wolf aura).

A real bad boy is starkly honest and an open book – he doesn’t pretend to be a saint yet he’s also tough enough to stand up for what he believes in and take on the world if he has to.

A real bad boy – takes no nonsense from nobody (not even from the woman he loves) but can also be very tender, attentive, vulnerable (dark side), ultra-sensual, incredibly passionate, determined and persistent.

A real bad boy – one of those rare men who is completely in touch with his natural instincts and able to articulate his own feelings (very calm in every situation).

A real bad boy – can be picky as hell but when he loves a woman, he loves her so deeply, so noticeably and so overpoweringly that he brings to life the TOTAL WOMAN she already is.

This is the kind of man almost all women would like their guy to be a little more like every now and then. In African native culture this kind of man is called “the warrior with the wildness of soul pounding in his veins”.

His WILD AND UNTAMED DISPOSITION (masculine energy) enrages women’s hormones and the DEPTH OF HIS EMOTIONAL RESONANCE (feminine energy) makes them want him like no other man can make them want, and keeps them wanting some more – and boy-oh-boy is he multi-layered or what!

Since it’s so much harder to acquire a “loving heart”, develop character and learn how to be sensitive to women’s feelings in ways that make women feel truly respected and truly loved, it’s so much harder for a jerk to embody that DEPTH OF EMOTIONAL RESONANCE that the bad boy has.

That gives you the Nice Guy an edge over jerks because most of you already have a lot of heart and character, and all you need to do is add in that WILD AND UNTAMED DISPOSITION that both captivates the hearts and enrages women’s hormones.

YES, A Nice Guy can get the upper hand on what women really want to see and feel when with him by simply taking the Nice Guy or Good Guy to the level of “I might be a real good man…but honey, I’m a real bad boy”.

And you don’t even have to sacrifice your values and who you really are.

You don’t need the tattoos, dreadlocks, the bling-bling, toothpick, undone shirt buttons, a leather jacket, buggy pants, motorbike or shiny wheels to be a “real” bad boy.

You don’t even have to be good looking – although it doesn’t hurt if you have those six-pack abs and rock butt – to be the man women can’t seem to get out of their mind.

You don’t have to be foul mouthed, push a bad-ass attitude or drive too fast on the open highway to inspire sensation, longing and desire in women.

And you don’t need the “Hey Babe, wanna get physical?” brash cockiness of a ’70s street pimp (a.k.a. Player) to instantly make the libidos of self-assured, serene, virtuous, charming, gracious, lively, incorrigibly attractive and emotionally healthy women sit up and howl – and howl LOUD!!


Excerpted from Christine Akiteng – “Good News For Nice Guys – Nice Guys Can Finish First” –



5 thoughts on “Becoming a Real Bad Boy!!

  1. Thank you for the insightful article. I agree on some of the points that you made. But what you were describing was not a “Bad Boy” but a man. Society confuses men into thinking that women are attracted to the “Bad”boy. They want a DECISIVE. man. Separate film from fact. All of these characters from movies are fictionalized versions of societal stereotypes that have been pounded into the male psyche, creating even more confusion. The bottom line is a woman wants a a balanced man. We are taught subconsciously that aggression is indicative to the male personality (ie gun toting, girl saving, exploding building, world saving dudes.) And that we should be like Will Smith’s and Martin Lawrence’s characters in the movie “Bad Boys”. Meh. Actually I’d rather be like Will Smith. Confident, charismatic and focused. In fact, if you asked him I bet he is very content in his family life right now. All the things you were describing are not the qualities of a “bad boy” but of a confident MAN. More specifically a Gentleman. Everything that you’ve just described can be ascribed to The Modern Gentleman. Lets be clear, the Gent is NOT a wimp or a douche. He has a focused power and intuition that he draws from a deep sense of right and wrong. No need to howl at the moon, or belt out a gutteral growl. A man is not aggressive, but assertive (there is a difference) balanced, unpredictable and dependable. Opinionated but not but not disrespectful. We agree on one thing. We need to see a resurgence of men acting like men. The Question is: what TYPE of man will you be?.

  2. StyleGent,

    Have we told you we love your style!? Dude, we’re a big fan and follower of your twitter stream! Keep up the great work bringing true gentlemanly class to the masses!

    And to reply to your comment: of course we’re speaking about the modern man. Problem is the man today is not looking to other men – the heroes, leaders and warriors and elders in society – to tell them who they should be and what values to espouse as a man.

    Instead they’re dependent on celebrity, rap stars and celluloid kings to tell them how to be a man. So one of the ways to get their attention is to aim a relevant-to-their-world term i.e. “bad boy” in their direction, then spin it round to get them thinking about the very question you’ve posed “what TYPE of man will you be?”

    Are we dumbing down the “MAN” message and assuming men need a simplistic approach to get them thinking about their manhood? No.

    What we’re trying to do at MSP is rattle, shake and provoke men into becoming the very best they can be, and it sometimes means pushing a few crazy notions down the pipe and getting their attention creatively.

    StyleGent, we love your work, thoughts and input. Thanks for weighing in on the discussion (keep doing it!!) and here’s hoping dudes get the message – the Modern Gentleman is in every man, we just need to encourage him to step UP and OUT!!

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