The Gentleman is the New Bad Boy

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The more women MenStylePower talk to, the more we realize that the Gentleman is a rare breed.

We here at MSP cater for the army of marginalised Gents who aren’t metro, or retro yet they’re somewhere in the middle. But what we do know, is our readers are gentlemen.

We’ve been saying for a long time, as gentlemen in modern times, you automatically stand out from the crowd. Most things you do as a Gentleman, are free. But one would be surprised how rarely they actually occur. The stress of life, constant distraction and financial pressure all pull our focus away from many acts we’d like to keep in our daily lives.

The new era of chivalry is not rooted in the chauvinistic mindset of the past. We have evolved past performing these acts for women because “they can’t do it themselves.”

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The respectful acts that define Gents are starting to emerge again and MenStylePower encourages you to showcase the wonderful things you do guys, for you and for the show of respect for those around you. Male and Female. It’s not feminine, it’s not daggy, it’s not non-masculine to show these acts. In fact, it’s very very necessary.

Take the hideous rise of ‘King Punches’ for instance. If you see a dude starting to get aggressive, it takes a man with gentleman qualities to stop him. If you see an elderly person needing assistance, it take a man with courage to step out and help them. It’s damn easy to turn a blind eye and much of the world is doing this. That’s why we call this post: THE GENTLEMAN IS THE NEW BAD GUY. YEAH!!

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Here are 8 acts of chivalry we often overlook and should work to bring back.

Giving up your seat.

Whether on a bus or on a crowded subway, giving up your seat to another is a rare but great sign of respect. I always cringe a bit when I see a woman or elderly person forced to stand while young men remain distracted by their phones. It all comes down to being aware of your surroundings and acting accordingly.

Only one in seven men will offer their seat to a woman on a train or bus.

Pulling out a woman’s chair.

This one, as many others, is simple but rare. You don’t have to run around to your date’s side of the table to make sure you pull out her chair each time, but when convenient, it’s a nice extra touch. One of our mates, who is French, stands up each time a woman leaves the table. This is European etiquette and not seen a lot in the US or Australia but it’s common in Europe. And P.S. women love it.

Less than one in five men will regularly pull out a chair for a woman to sit down. That’s under 20%.

Open doors for her.

This is one of the staples of chivalrous respect and probably the easiest to perform, as we all walk through doors every day. We don’t want to make any assumptions, but something tells me the extra few seconds it takes to open a door or let someone walk through first won’t ruin your day.

The same goes for car doors, a woman will appreciate you getting out of the car to open the door for her, or walking around to her side first. It’s amazing to me how many men don’t do this.

Call, don’t text a date invite.

Just the fact that you would take the time to actually call a woman to ask her out on a date will put you light-years ahead of your competition (of which there is a lot). Plus, you’ll be able to tell how excited or enthusiastic she is (or isn’t) about accepting your offer by actually hearing her voice.

Compliments, compliments, compliments.

I don’t know how many times I’ve heard that it’s a rare occasion for a woman to be complimented in her relationship?

What? Why?

Every guy in a relationship should take the time every day to let his woman know how beautiful he thinks she is. And the reason for this? As young boys have a dream of being the fireman, astronaut, warrior, Luke Skywalker….as do young girls of being a maiden, a princess, a queen. And guess what….you still deep down want to be that warrior right?

Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.

The purpose of this lost art is to show your willingness to be splashed instead of a woman should a passing car run through a puddle. Furthermore, in some countries people would throw trash out of windows, and the person walking closer to the building, was less likely to be hit.

It’s an effortless way to show her that you care – and if she doesn’t know why you’re doing it…then it’s a conversation starter.

Walking her to her door.

At the end of your date, especially early on in the relationship, walk her safely to her door. This is especially important if she lives in a city. It shows you’re willing to put effort into protecting her and makes her feel safe – two important aspects of building her trust and comfort.

Especially the protection part!

Parking far away? Drop her off first.

If you’re having a hard time finding a parking space close to her destination, offer to drop her off at the door while you go and look for a spot. She may be fine with walking the distance, but it’s a nice gesture to save her the effort, especially if she’s wearing heels.

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And here are the WOMEN’S 10 Rules in how to SPOT a Gentleman.

  1. He looks straight into your beautiful eyes.
  2. He is punctual in nature.
  3. Does not send SMS and puts away his iPad in your presence.
  4. He lets you drive his (sport) car.
  5. he makes you mother laugh, and also your grandmother.
  6. He can say ‘Good morning’, ‘Goodbye’, ‘Please’, ‘Thank you’ and … ‘After you.’ In four languages.
  7. He really listens and remembers your conversation from the night before.
  8. Hides a tuxedo in his wardrobe.
  9. Doesn’t ever claim to be a Gentleman.
  10. He wears only enough fragrance so you can pick up the scent…and go closer.

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The mission of the New Chivalry Movement is to bring men (and women) together who strive to be the best versions of themselves and love and respect those around them.